Watch how he or she treats waitresses, employees, family members and anyone else he/she comes into contact with. Here is a rule that is rarely broken: Whatever problems you have before the wedding day, you will have during your marriage. The more you share, especially values, the better your chances of a good marriage. If you are basically happy, do not think for a moment that you can make an unhappy person happy by marrying him or her.
I promise you how the person treats others now is how this person will treat you later. It is exceptionally difficult to find the right person to marry. That is why it is so important to think through your decision by asking and answering critical questions. Do not think that marrying will solve any problem you have with the person. For example, if you think television watching is a form of self abuse and your prospective spouse loves watching for hours a day, you may have a big problem. On the contrary, the ability of the unhappy to make the happy unhappy is far greater than the ability of the happy to make the unhappy happy. How much of your love is dependent on the sex you are having?
Instead, take a day or two to mull over his answers and decide where you want the relationship to go.
Think about what's important to you in terms of your current relationship.
Will honest answers to these 12 questions either help you marry well or avoid a marriage that can make your life miserable? Ask any married or divorced person who will open up to you whether these questions need to be answered. Not the never-married, like you, who usually know nothing about marriage.
If you didn’t have to worry about money or a job, where would you live in the world? What was the last book that you got so absorbed in that you couldn’t put it down?
If these questions and the ones I will pose in Part II are answered honestly and help determine your decision, your chances of entering a happy marriage or avoiding an unhappy one are dramatically increased. You therefore have three choices: Make peace with the problem, see if it can be solved before deciding to marry, or don’t marry the person. Likewise if you have opposing political and social views to which you are passionately committed. The power of sex is so great that it often obscures problems of relating to one another. Do you love talking when you don’t see, let alone touch, each other — such as by phone or computer?
at Web MD, sharing personal thoughts and feelings is crucial to building a lasting relationship.If you find his answers are not compatible with yours more often than not, you may want to cut your losses early.